What you feel is life, what you live is another story.

Tag: Heaven (Page 2 of 2)

A Conversation of Love

 

 

 

 

 

 

My friend you ask such a wonderful question!  Let me try to answer you in the only way I can.  Let’s be still for a moment…

My Soul knows.  In some respects It has always known.  Before my mind could question a thing my Soul knew.  Before I could form words or understand their meaning my Soul understood.  Before the concepts of time and space took hold in me my Soul felt her presence.  When I learned to crawl I was crawling towards her. When I learned to walk and to run she was the finish line.  Before I could read or write I had already written the book of her in my heart.  Each experience of this life has led me toward her, the woman I’ve known a thousand lifetimes and loved since the dawn of my Soul’s creation.

I cannot explain how it feels when I look at her, when I see her face.  I cannot explain why my heart jumps when I see her smile, or feel her fingers snake between my own.  I can’t explain the welling up in my eyes at the very thought of her.  I can’t explain or describe any of it, but I know it’s there and I know it is my Soul talking to me clearly.

And although my mind may not always be satisfied with the answers it gets.  It may not always like what it sees.  It may not always have faith.  It may not always have blind trust in the woman who inspires such Love in me.  But my Soul, ah my Soul, well It always knows who she is.  My Soul always sees the light of Love radiate from the clouds my mind has created.  Those rays of love warm even the coldest parts of me, and even when my mind creates things that don’t exist or focuses on those human things that do, my Soul always feels those rays of light and always knows they’re there.  They are the meaning of it all.

That is why I love her my friend.  Not because of some need of my body or mind, but because my Soul wills it to be.  Because my Soul knows, as It always has and always will.  When I close my eyes for that final time and breathe my last, my Soul will still be with her, and Its heart she will carry into whatever place she travels next.  She is not perfect in this form but my Soul bears her name regardless of where my body or mind take me.  That is Love, my friend.  It is a Mindful, mindless, pure and simple Love that encompasses all of who we are.

What a gift it has been to have it, and what a gift it has been to see it at work.  Each tear a gift unto itself; each twitch of pain a confirmation of the simple truth of Love often left complicated by a mind seeking to explain it.  In letting go, however, in leaving the mind to its quieted place behind the Soul if even for a moment, you will see it clearly.  You feel it, you have no doubts as It carries you beyond your mortal place into a Heaven best left secret to Lovers.  Yes, it is in your midst and you can’t see it only because you have failed to look with your Soul but rather chosen to look with your mind’s eye.  Forget the mind for a moment and see It in all of Its glory.  That is Love, that is power, and that is her.  Now, take her hand and walk into the Sunrise and never look back again.

Her Eyes (Love’s Warrior Series)

 

He could smell the moment he had waited so patiently for.  It seemed like a lifetime ago he first had looked into her eyes.  Those ivory-circled pools of beauty had captured him, and as he dove deep into their magic he found something he had not expected.  He found Love.  He found clarity.  He found Himself.

His life was not one that suggested these things were possible.  He could feel the scars inflicted in his time, and they reminded him of moments when those eyes would not have stopped him.  His mind would wander in the moments that had led up to this, to the very moment when he knew who he was.  Those wounds would sometimes cause him to scream out in pain.  Other times they would cause him to recoil in anticipation.  Still others the reaction was a simple reminder that each rose has a thorn and that each pool of beauty had a depth that could drown even the heartiest of swimmers.  There was nothing simple about that reminders in actuality, they created the reaction he could not control.  Much like the swimmer drowning he would lash out uncontrollably, often attacking his rescuer in the most horrible of ways.  He could not control himself in those moments of fear.  He was drowning, and he was unconscious of his actions beyond survival.

She had hung on.  She would subdue him in these moments.  Sometimes her rescue would come in the form of letting him struggle until he was too tired to struggle anymore.  In others she would turn her back on him and head to her shore.  He would reach out to her in those moments and she would always take his hand.  In other times she would fight him and they would find themselves bloodied and bruised but in each other’s arms, safe and secure.  It must have been a sight to behold for her as her Warrior struggled with unseen demons and irrelevant wounds in what would be an otherwise serene place to bathe.  Yet, she had her own demons and her own wounds, and they often showed themselves in ways he would respond to.  He would fight them with her.  He would cradle her in his arms in the darkness.  He would stand by her regardless of which demon suggested the knife she carried was meant for him.  Another moment in her arms would be worth the wound and much, much more.

He looked up from his memory into those eyes.  The familiar surge ran up his spine.  He had long stopped trying to describe this surge to her.  It felt something like a mixture of immense strength and complete weakness.  His body would stand firm and his knees buckled. His heart would find a clarity even as his mind became a cloudy mess.  His Soul would settle into a calmness even as his heartbeat and breathing quickened.  He had resigned himself to a complete inability to describe this moment until he settled on the simple word that seemed indescribable Itself:

“Love.”

Yes, this was Love for him.  It was the Kingdom of God he might never have seen if not for those eyes.  It was the Garden of Eden he was cast out of when he became ashamed of his nakedness.  It was the realization that of the million lifetimes he had felt course through his moments this one exposed the Truth of truths.  Love is beautiful.  Love is peaceful.  Love is the moment you realize you are not the sum of your experiences, you are the realization of the moment.  As the surge invaded his Being there were no scars.  There were no memories.  There was only here and there was only now.  Here and now had him lost in her eyes unable to remember that time or this space.

As their hands grasped for each other all ideas of separation vanished as the heat rose within them.  He could feel her Soul speak to him and guide him to those places he simply had to go.  There were no barriers, no walls, just two Souls merging into One complete understanding.  There were no words needed, no guidance required as they explored their desire in perfect harmony with one another.  It was here they knew the perfection of the Universe.

They kissed passionately and breathed in each other’s essence as their bodies betrayed the rising desire building within them.  The room faded from their awareness as only they mattered in the moment.  Clothing disappeared as did any inhibitions their pasts had taught them.  They teased each other’s bodies, they played a tune unique to their own set symphony.  She would taste him and he her in sheer delightful ecstasy.  His mouth became her tool, her’s his as they took each other to places never seen by either.  Her wetness surrounded him as she took his hardness in.  They would dance a dozen dances to a hundred beats climaxing too many times to count along the way.  Finally he would explode as he gazed into her eyes, knowing she had exploded as well.

They would collapse in each other’s arms having given all of themselves to one another.  This is where God’s home truly could be found – in the arms of a lover who had given so freely of herself that nothing else existed but that Gift.  Her moans were the Angels singing, their movement the perfection of the Universe.  This moment was the Big Bang.  It was a moment when everything was created and a new Universe showed Itself.  As he searched for her eyes she looked into his.  Tears disguised as beads of sweat flowed freely from his eyes as his hand found hers.  He stared into beautiful ivory-rimmed pools of eternity knowing where he was.  He felt renewed, and could feel the surge begin again in his spine.  Actually, it had never gone.  It was like a constant glow that became more intense as her eyes looked deep into him and pulled out the once-forgotten beauty that resided there.  He wasn’t drowning, he was saved, and as he leaned in to touch her lips with his he could sense he had found a place he never wanted to leave.

He was home.

 

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