She woke me with her mouth
I stirred
Growing in that moist embrace
Hardening in the moment
Finding her desire in my own.
She took me to her sacred places
I followed
Trusting in her loving guidance
Finding truth in her oasis
Realizing heaven in the rush of mindful pleasure.
I entered her – deeply and without reservation
She surrendered
Accepting love in our embrace
Reaffirming truth in each thrust of our intentions
In each moan, in each scream, in each testament of our hearts.
The pace quickened in the Divine instruction
She listened
Taking me to the brink of insanity
Showing me what’s beyond that glorious ledge
But never allowing me to take that holy plunge.
Until…
The tsunami broke free from the horizon
We came
We jumped together, took the plunge to heaven’s gate
We lit the darkness as one mighty flame
And in that space revered a new universe was born.
Author: Tom (Page 51 of 71)
Tom is a stroke survivor, a seeker, a meditator, a veteran firefighter and rescue tech, a motivational speaker, a poet, and a blogger (new site) & author. He is also the father of three and as their student and teacher, has found applying spiritual practices to all aspects of life provides a vast amount of possibility and abundance. Tom has discovered that true forgiveness is the key to a pure heart, and a pure heart can lead us to wondrous experiences.
You can also connect with tom on <a href="https://www.facebook.com/Tomgwriter55/".
And so I walk…
I’ve closed my eyes and felt your hand on my shoulder, and opened them to find you gone. I’ve touched my blinded hands to the air and found your fingers upon my own, and with sight restored I’ve only found the open sky gazing back at me. I’ve dreamed of you a million times, only to find myself alone – beautifully alone – when the dawn begs my eyes to open.
I do not question those lonely footprints in the sand. I do not question the solitude when it comes. I realize all is well, all is perfect. What better place for a loner to be than alone, what more perfect view does a man have when unobstructed by the cautious, insane birds that fly away at the sound of the rushing surf?
There is no better place to be for this Warrior. The waves shall bring her to his beach, a sturdy hand to hold his own, a strong companion who together study the clouds from above and survey the deepest valleys from below. They will sing a song in unison, undaunted by the winds of change, unimpeded by the storms of emotional disillusionment, eternal beyond the wounds that life has given.
And so I walk. I walk and I walk and I do not stop save the rests necessary to keep my natural gait. Not questioning, not demanding, just walking. The sword I carry is as wide as my arms and only as potent as my embrace. My muscles are no longer tense for the fight, but for the not-so-silent moments of ecstatic surrender, the gift of divine exploration as two bodies melt into one sea. To you I will someday raise my white flag, and one day I will not fight with you at my back, but rather love with you in my arms.
And to this end we walk, and to this end we wander aimfully through the passages of our time together.
Dreaming…in segments
Disturbed innocence in the realm of possibility
Left me wondering in a pool of uncertainty
Tomorrow’s truth is yesterday’s lie
Forever telling stories.
One day I was born
Given to the burdens of my ancestors
Eventually I’ll die
And wither away to the nether
Yet a Creator I’ll be to the last.
Life…that experience between
Is what I’m here for
The pains and the joys
The smiles and the sorrows
The climbs and the cascades.
Pardon me if the rules can’t apply
Even if they do
Excuse me if I don’t participate in your insanity
Even when I do
Allow me the folly, then the faith, of this reality.
The child cries in an unholy lust
The boy reviled in some darkened melancholy
The adult is caught in the throes of metamorphosis
The change, painful and daunting in its blood lust
The result, a merciful reprieve.
The young ones born within his slumber
The love, the perfect nirvana
The loss, the perfect nirvana
The closeness and unbridled bliss
The result nothing but some perfect harmony.
Hear me shout a certain song
Then hear me hum a lullaby
Sleep and slumber a rich man’s right
While the poor slaved sleep deprived
The looters vilified as the banker’s laughed.
My heart bleeds bright red tears
As my brain recovers from its numbness
My body, plump with unrequited sadness
My heart burdened by the secrets of frightening liberation
My soul just wants to know.
In aloneness I feel inseparable
In a crowd I feel so separated
In friendship I feel a beautiful revelation
In love I am reminded of that glorious dream
Segments showing me the realm of glorious possibility.
I was born once
Or maybe a million times
Presented with a million stories
Of a million ideas creating a million tears
And I suffocated, writhed and wilted.
I lived once
Or maybe a million times
A million muddy footprints in the sand
A million hand holds to that mountain’s top
Trying to sit there, on top of the world.
I died once
Or maybe a million times
A million last breaths give birth to a million firsts
A million times I succumbed to sigh
Closed my eyes, and said goodbye.
Awakened here, I love it so
An eternal wave of a sacred pebble cast
That is me, both pebble and ripple and puddle and sea
I cannot forget yet I cannot remember
This life…or that…or the in between.
And thus, I go
Who am I
To tell you how beautiful you are?
How your eyes light up my heart,
How your mind teases me into submission?
Who am I
To suggest little things to you,
To tantalize myself with thoughts of passion,
To remind myself of times I only hope could be?
I am but a dreamer,
A fool…
A warrior without a battle,
A timekeeper without a watch,
Macbeth without his bell.
So who am I
To tell you these simple truths?
To make you smile under your umbrella
To have you wander in the rain?
Who am I
To love you from a distance?
To believe in magic miracles
To want you in soft wonders of the moonlight?
I am but a fool
A dreamer…
Lost in the mist of his own mind
Trusting in the song of his own heart
Gone into such places full of time where we belong.
I wonder where we’d be without the judgment of others. I wonder what we would look like. Who would we be?
I think I’d be a Buddha sitting under a tree.
In a world that’s gone crazy A crowd stops by my home They stare at a sight They have never quite known. I’m sitting in stillness Tattered clothes on my back I’m full of contentment Yet all they see is I lack. They laugh and they shout As I sit under my tree “Get a job you old bum, You need to be more like me!” With a snort and a laugh They will surely all scurry They have deadlines to meet And lives full of worry. And while we hustle and bustle In the new cars we buy We ignore the things That survive when we die. Yet in sitting and loving And being so dull What was closed is now open An empty cup is now full. This tree blocks the sun On the hottest part of the day The fruit falls from its branches To the soft grass where I lay. The rain softly caresses My skin and my hair, And while I choose to sit still There is nothing keeping me there. I’ll smile in silence A withered hand I’ll extend There is nothing to lose When everything is your friend. The clouds will float by The seasons will change, The clock will strike zero What was real will seem strange. And on my last breath This old man will have shown There was nothing he’d lost In the life he had known. But for now I will sit A man trying to see That brave part of himself That sits under a tree.
Through the numbness gaze I see
Cloudy, murky, beholden to the current
Leaning, listing, the stormy sky emblazoned
Calmly, the whitecaps form.
Through the blinded folds of skin I feel
Nothing, lost moments, surrounded by light everywhere
Laying still yet falling into the whirlpool
Rising, the foamy surf left evidence to the dying.
Lovely, I’m lost to the bliss of my own ignorance
Awakened in a moment, I cannot stand to shout
Aware in a flash, I cannot look to see that spark
Forever changed, the light enters me where I am wounded.
But such is the way of great fortune
To be wounded but alive
To be silenced but not forgotten, then heard again
She reaches for the coldness and brings a warmth renewed.
One wobbles, but does not fall
One stumbles, but finds sure footing
Somewhere, beyond the certainty of the next step
Comes the power of where the feet now stand.
One regrets, but accepts what cannot be changed
One worries, but gives himself to the great Ocean on which he lives
There, in the horizon that we call our home
Come the Sunrises and Sunsets that define our days.
Goodnight, dear, see me in your dreams
Goodbye, friend, hear me in your laughter
Feel me as the waves caress your feet, as the Sun warms your face
Know me when the light appears as a new day comes.
There is nothing to fear there, in the waves
Dance like you’ve never danced before
And know me there, everywhere
No surrender, no retreat, just calm acceptance of the Warrior.
Now, let’s go, to that healing place
Let’s bask in the warm water
Play in the lush fields where the color is blinding
And hold this moment dear.
Let’s leave the worry to others
Go crazy in the surf, find ecstasy in the sand
Together, as lovers sitting on an Earthen altar
Together in every breeze, in every wave, in every squawking seagull.
There is heaven.
There is hell.
There is everything in between
And it is there that we will find ourselves in a solid truth.
Now, it seems, is time to introduce you to my muse.
Rather than do this in what would seem to be easy fashion, I’d like to do it the way my heart tells me to, using the methods by which the Universe speaks through me. Please meet her as my heart speaks in the written word.
See, a picture would be too two-dimensional, a handshake too cordial, a video too incomplete. I’d rather introduce you to this gift in the way most of you were introduced to me. So, here goes.
Imagine for one moment you are thirsty and you are wondering through a scorching desert looking for something to drink. Everywhere you look there are pitted stones, dying trees, and the bones of dead memories strewn about in some chaotic fashion. Some of these you put in your mouth, only to be repulsed by bitterness. Others you don’t even get near, the stench is just too much for you to take. So you continue to search, to imagine what it would be like to find that one drink of water. You never give up hope.
Then, suddenly, you come upon a clear, cool spring in a lush oasis. You bend your knee to drink, that first heavenly gulp saving you as each swallow afterward reminds you not only of the thirst that nearly killed you, but of the wonderfulness of the Universe that brought you here. You take long, mindful drinks from that pond, and relax patiently on the plush grasses provided while enjoying the fruits of that place.
You are sure you will never leave. There is nothing out there for you, and everything you have ever wanted is right here. So, you give thanks, you care for that space, and you rest in a certainty that you are, and always have been, right where you belong.
That’s my muse. I’m glad you have had the opportunity to meet her.
Now walk with me. The Sun is blistering hot, and the sky offers no respite from its assault. You walk onward, the sweat dripping from your skin like tired stories of a slow demise. Each step gets harder than the last, but onward you march until…
..finally…
…. a large tree rises from above the unforgiving sands. You sit under her, enjoying the cool comfort as you are refreshed from your journey. She dries the sweat from your skin, cools the burning rage in your heart, and steels you for the effort that still lay ahead; all while assuring you that you can always return to her, without ever wondering where she’s been.
That’s my muse. Please shake her hand, and give her your utmost respect. She deserves nothing less.
Now sail with me on my Ocean. The seas are rough, the storm mighty as the ship tosses roughly around while the gods argue your very existence. You are battered against the wooden frame, bruised against the solid mast until, finally, you are tossed overboard into the murky mayhem that quickly surrounds you and drags you down…
…down…
…down.
The last thing you remember is your impending demise. The last thing you see is a vast, bottomless cauldron of darkness. You finally surrender to your doom.
You awaken on a soft, sandy shore, the Sun warming you, the light breeze sending chills up your entire being. You gasp as you remember your breath, and you inhale deeply as if you were newly born. You sigh as you embrace the earth around you, and you cry as a testament not only to where you are, but where you have come from.
There, right there, is my muse. I don’t possess her any more than I could possess the air around me, but I certainly utter lovely prayers of gratitude with each passing breath. “I love you,” I say. “Breathe,” she replies. I love you too.
Now that you have met her, love her as you do while I love her as I do. Know her through the air that you breathe, the water than quenches your thirst, the earth that gives you a safe place to stand after nearly drowning in the Sea. Be tender with her as she is tender with you, and give her your full attention. Do not question the Sunrise and Sunset, but give thanks for the experience of her absence by truly appreciating her presence.
She is my muse, and with each word you find value in thank her with all your heart.
Love.
I’ve been reflecting on myself today, as reflected by a myriad of others who provide me with some context.
<Inhale>
I’ve been blessed, although I am sure in a way most would not consider a “blessing.” Yet, I have been as I see it, in the most beautifully painful and complete way possible. There are no blessings and curses in my life, only blessings, and I accept them completely.
There is a tremendous amount of love in the depths I’ve been driven to explore. Ever since I was a young boy, I’ve sought out meaning to each experience, often reliving the “negative” experience over and over again until, finally, the meaning was discovered. Often I’d use “positive” experiences as a contrast in order to discover things I would have never seen otherwise.
Ironically, many things I once thought of as “positive” are no longer so, and those I considered “negative” have changed to wonderful positives. The mind-world connection is amazing; once you change your mind your world changes, and as your world changes so does your mind.
It’s why I don’t consider love in the way most do. I don’t see it as a positive or a negative, but rather the canvas by which both are painted. It doesn’t change, only our minds do. Instead, it remains constant and accepting of that wonderful vehicle of mind/ego. Love and ego work together to expose the truth…a constant that only changes when we do. Love is truly like water…it takes any form you place it in.
Enjoy the metamorphosis, and the evolution. You will see others who are beginning to become aware of this journey, and you will smile as they protest, as they shout out all of their good intentions. You will take joy, and some pain, in the distortions they try to hold onto, and you will always offer a helping hand, in your own unique way. And you will recognize those hands offered to you, even if they weren’t fully aware they were extended.
Acceptance is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to acceptance. Tolerance is not the key to peace, peace is the key to tolerance. Gratefulness is not the key to love, love is the key to gratefulness.
And maybe, just maybe, the Bodhi tree was not the path to enlightenment, enlightenment was the path to the Bodhi tree. Perhaps the cross was not the path to salvation, but salvation the path to the cross. Perhaps you were not the means to love, but love was the means to you.
<Exhale>
My newest, heart-felt submission to Elephant Journal.
“In a world confused by me, she understands me. She brings my voice into tune, my heart into rhythm, my sight into focus. She has no need to question me, she is the answer. She is the rock that steadies the sands beneath my feet, and the wind that moves the clouds hiding the warmth I’d like to feel.”
http://www.elephantjournal.com/2014/10/when-i-love-you-comes/
A sigh can be a mantra of sorts, reminding us of a dream that inspires us, of a passion that fuels us, a desire that makes the unreal real in a way that speaks of unlimited possibility.See more on Elephant Journal at http://www.elephantjournal.com/2014/09/the-sun-loves-you-poem/