“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” ― Lao Tzu
He felt her without ever seeing her. He closed his eyes, reached out, and there was her hand…wanting his…grasping for his as well. There were no words necessary in the moments they shared, he gave himself freely to her and she to him. When he faltered she was there to push him up. When she fell he was there to lift her up. They found strength in one another not out of weakness of self, but out of a resounding strength that love itself had provided.
He was strong without her, but stronger with her by his side. She was a mighty woman in her own right, but he brought her to new heights. There was not shame in this surrender, only the joy of finding a space where few would tread before them. They gave of each other in ways they could only give to one another, and they relished in those moments that such vulnerability offered. They tended to each other’s wounds, wiped each other’s brow in battle not out of a need for such frivolity, but out of a desire to have the other there. The Moon had found her Sun and the Sun had found his Moon. There is no weakness or shame in either discovery.
He would never leave her side. When the battle seemed lost he found his strength in knowing the love inside him. When all was hopeless she would close her eyes and feel his arms around her. When fear surrounded them the took each other’s backs and fought that fear together like Hell itself was born. He wore the scars that were meant for her while she fought off the demons that attacked him. They were unbeatable.
They did not bother with the formalities of normalcy. Passion ruled their lives, as did the relentless way they attacked life together. He could take her and kiss her in a crowded room and she could demand the same with equal desire. They could read each other’s eyes from across the ocean, and run the waves to see the conversation consummated. The clouds parted in their moments of ecstasy, and the stars themselves gave way to the heat of their passion. They need not pretend for the sake of others, others simply quaked in the presence of such Divine power.
Such fierceness needed no guidance. They spoke a language only they understood, and they spoke it well. They found suredness in each other and never questioned the foundations they sat themselves upon. This House Undivided could stand the test of any clime, condition or wanton raid from those shadows that had destroyed even the mightiest cities. There were ready, they were firm, and they were One.
“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” ― Robert A. Heinlein, “Stranger in a Strange Land”
It is never easy to give yourself to someone else. It is, to some extent, the most frightening experience of life. You offer the most vulnerable part of you to someone who can either choose to accept it, deny it, embrace it, or trample it into the ground. It takes great courage to open yourself up to such a thing and to consider that, for this person, you are willing to fight battles not winnable that you would otherwise run from. It’s rare, and it’s painful when it fails but absolutely awesome when it doesn’t.
There has never been a fight I’ve been in or a challenge I’ve faced where painful failures were not part of the possible outcome. Today I stand chest bared, sword in hand with an open arm to my Queen, to whom I would fight a million men and die a million deaths. It is a beautiful intensity to which I may pay a hefty price, but if I cannot pay a hefty price for this I cannot find value in any thing else outside of my children. This snarl, this inner growl, this intense devotion to this feeling much be honored in the only way I know how to honor mySelf – with the Love, devotion and countenance it deserves.
I am ready, and getting stronger by the day. Soon, words will be unnecessary.